Navigating Pregnancy and Postpartum

By Dr. Nicole Kumi, PhD, PMH-C, founder of The Whole Mom

Bringing a new baby into the world is a journey marked by excitement, joy, and new challenges. While much attention is given to pregnancy and birth, the postpartum period, also known as the fourth trimester, is just as important for parents and baby.

Preparing for postpartum life requires emotional and physical planning, though most parents don’t think about it until they’re in the thick of it! To help you prepare, I’ve outlined some practical steps you can take to ease the transition and set yourself up with the support you need to feel confident and empowered in your new role as parent.

Emotional preparation for postpartum

Postpartum emotions can range from overwhelming joy to unexpected sadness. Anticipating and preparing for these changes in advance can help ease the transition.

 Acknowledge the emotional shifts

• Hormonal changes, lack of sleep, and new responsibilities can create emotional ups and downs. Remind yourself that these feelings are completely normal.

• Develop a sleep support plan that allows your partner to help with nightly feedings and allows you to get adequate rest at least two nights out of the week. 

• The "baby blues" (mood swings, irritability, and tearfulness) are common in the first two weeks after giving birth. If symptoms persist or intensify, postpartum depression (PPD) or anxiety may be the culprit, in which case you’ll want to reach out to your healthcare provider for guidance.

• Documenting your daily experiences in a journal can help you track these emotional shifts and better understand their frequency and intensity. This gives you a better snapshot of how you’re transitioning into the fourth trimester.

• Reframe your understanding of birth as an experience that brings forth baby and mother. While you may have brought new life into the world, you’ve also birthed a new identity for yourself! This can help to put your feelings into perspective, as you and baby will be learning aside each other. Be as kind to yourself as you are to baby.

 Communicate with your partner and support system

• Discuss your expectations and fears with your partner, family, or close friends before the baby arrives. 

• Consider using your partner as a buffer when communicating personal or difficult feelings to extended family. Asking them to speak on your behalf alleviates some of the emotional burden on you.

• Expressing your emotions and needs openly increases the likelihood that you’ll receive the support you need.

• Remember, your support system will genuinely want to help you, but won’t be able to unless you are honest about what you are experiencing and how you feel, even when it is hard!

 Don’t wait to seek help

• If you have a history of anxiety or depression, talk to your doctor in advance about postpartum mental health management.

• Even if you don’t have a history of mental health concerns, consider speaking with a therapist or joining a postpartum support group. Postpartum is a time marked by significant change, and there’s no harm in processing your experiences with others.
  
  

Physical preparation for postpartum

While recovering from childbirth takes time and can be unpredictable, there are a few proactive steps you can take to make the healing process smoother.

 Prepare a postpartum basket

Having essential supplies ready makes recovery more comfortable. Consider stocking up on the following:

• For vaginal births: A peri bottle, maxi pads, witch hazel pads, and sitz bath supplies

• For C-sections: Abdominal support bands, loose clothing, and gentle wound care supplies

• For breastfeeding: Nipple cream, breast pads, and comfortable nursing bras

• General postpartum care: Water bottles, chapstick, and hand sanitizer

 Set up a comfortable resting space

• Ensure you have a cozy area where you can comfortably rest, feed, and bond with baby

• Keep essentials like diapers, wipes, burp cloths, and water on hand throughout the house so they’re always accessible.

 Stock on snacks and fill your freezer

• Adequate hydration and nutrient-dense foods support your recovery and energy levels. Healthy snacks will be a lifesaver!

• Prepare large batches of food and freeze individual portions to ensure you have nourishing meals at the ready.

• Coordinate a meal train as a part of your baby registry or register for meal services.

 Set up a postpartum support system

Building a strong support system ahead of baby’s arrival will make a world of difference.

 Build your village

• Identify family members, friends, and neighbors who can help with meals, childcare for older siblings, and house chores.

• As uncomfortable as it may feel at first, don’t hesitate to accept help! Letting others support you allows you to focus on recovery and bonding with baby.

• Talk about things your support network should look for if you begin to struggle. Are you the type of person who gets angry when your mental health dips, or are you more likely to appear sad? How do your eating habits or sleep patterns change? Sharing this information with others allows them to recognize when you might be struggling and take action accordingly.

 Hire or arrange for professional support

• Consider hiring a postpartum doula, perinatal coach, or night nurse for extra assistance when you’re deep in the newborn trenches.

• Lactation consultants can provide guidance if you experience breastfeeding challenges and may be covered by your health insurance.

 Connect with other parents

• Join local and/or virtual new parent groups to share experiences, gain insights, and access support.

• Many communities offer postpartum classes or mommy-and-me groups that can offer a sense of connection to new parents.
  

 Manage your expectations and practice self-compassion

 Let go of perfection

• Adjusting to life with a newborn takes time. It’s okay if things don’t go as planned! The only constant in parenthood is change. Learning to embrace the ups and downs allows the whole family to thrive.

• Be kind to yourself. Rest when you can and don't pressure yourself to "bounce back" quickly. Every body recovers differently!

 Prioritize self-care

• Even small moments of alone time, like taking a shower, drinking a cup of tea, or stepping outside for fresh air can help improve your well-being.

• Ask for help. Self-care is essential, not selfish!

• Limit your social media use in the first few weeks. This can keep you from falling into Dr. Google rabbit holes and comparison traps when you’re particularly vulnerable.

• In the same way that you develop a nightly routine for baby, implement one for yourself. This ensures that your basic needs are met and helps your body enter into a parasympathetic state, which promotes better sleep quality. 
  

 Final thoughts

Postpartum is a time of profound transformation, both physically and emotionally. With a bit of advanced planning and a solid support system, you can ease your transition into parenthood with more confidence and less stress. Remember that asking for help, prioritizing rest, and being kind to yourself are key components of a healthy postpartum journey.  

Want more? Birthing Her is a free guide Nicole shares with clients to help them process the birth of the mother alongside that of the baby and prepare for that birth with the same energy they give to the birth of the baby.